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11/10/2007
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Music jokes

Q: What do you call the folks who hang around the musicians at conservatories?A: Violists.

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Q: What is the best recording of the Walton viola concerto?A: Music Minus One....

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Q: Whats the difference between trumpet players and government bonds?A: Government bonds eventually mature and earn mone...

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Q: How do you get a viola section to play spiccato?A: Write a whole note with "solo" above it....

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Q. Whats the definition of a quarter tone? A. A bagpiper tuning his drones....

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1st man: "My neighbors were screaming and yelling at three oclock this morning!"2nd man: "Did they wake you?"1st man: "N...

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Q: Two musicians are walking down the street, and one says to the other, "Who was that piccolo I saw you with last night...

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Q.How is a heart like a musician?A.They both have a beat :)...

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Q. Why do bagpipers leave their cases on their dashboards? A. So they can park in handicapped zones....

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Q: Why did the bass player get mad at the timpanist?A: He turned a peg and wouldnt tell the bass player which one....

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When a young hotshot conductor was making his debut at the Met, he showed the jaded and skeptical orchestra how well he...