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4
11/10/2007
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Mental health jokes

A man who thinks hes George Washington has been seeing a psychiatrist. He finishes up one session by telling him, "Tomorrow, well cross the Delaware and surprise them when they least expect it." As soon as hes gone, the psychiatrist picks up the phone and says, "King George, this is Benedict Arnold. I have the plans."

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Mental health jokes

Patient: Doctor, I get the feeling that people dont give a hoot about anything I say. Psychiatrist: So?...

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How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?None. The light bulb will change itself when its ready....

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How many Histrionic P.D. does to take to change a lightbulb?"You want me to change the lightbulb? I could burn my hand!...

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A man is strolling past the mental hospital and suddenly remembers an important meeting.Unfortunately, his watch has sto...

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How many psychoanalysts does it take to change a light bulb?"How many do you think it takes?"...

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How do you tell the difference between the staff and the inmates at a psychiatric hospital?The patients get better and l...

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Doctor, doctor, I cant concentrate, one minute Im ok, and the next minute, Im blank!And how long have you had this compl...

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One out of every four people is suffering from some form of mental illness. Check three friends. If theyre OK, then its...

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Mental health jokes

Psychiatrist to his nurse: "Just say were very busy. Dont keep saying Its a madhouse."...

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Mental health jokes

The psychology instructor had just finished a lecture on mental health and was giving an oral test.Speaking specifically...