Lawyer Jokes Category:

All our jokes listing within the lawyer jokes category are listed below. Click on any of the items to view the full joke.

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Lawyer jokes

If a lawyer and an IRS agent were both drowning, and you could only save one of them, would you go to lunch or read the...

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Lawyer jokes

If an apple a day keeps the doctor away, how many orchards does it take for a lawyer?...

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Lawyer jokes

If I had but one life to give for my country, it would be a lawyers....

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Lawyer jokes

If two lawyers were drowning, and you could only save one ofthem, would you read the paper or go to lunch?...

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Lawyer jokes

If you laid all the lawyers in the world head to foot around the Equator, then...Hey, come to think of it, thats not a b...

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Lawyer jokes

In the construction field, it is often noted that lawyers make the worst clients. However, a couple of years ago I met a...

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Lawyer jokes

It seems that a devout, good couple was about to get married,but a tragic car accident ended their lives. When they got...

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Lawyer jokes

Lawyer: "Let me give you my honest opinion."Client: "No, no. Im paying for professional advice."...

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Lawyer jokes

Lawyer: "Now that you have been acquitted, will you tell me truly? Did you steal the car?"Client: "After hearing your am...

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Lawyer jokes

Q. Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?A. From chasing parked ambulances....

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Lawyer jokes

Q: If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why dont you swerve to hit him?A: It might be your bicycle....

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Lawyer jokes

The bartender asks him "Whatll you have?". The guy answers, "A scotch, please". The bartender hands him the drink, and s...

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Lawyer jokes

The first lawyer questioning a panel of prospective jurors began right off as an intimidating showman. When he came to h...

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Lawyer jokes

What do lawyers do after they die?They lie still....

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Lawyer jokes

What do you call an honest lawyer?An oxymoron....

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Lawyer jokes

What is black and brown and looks good on a lawyer? A Doberman....

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Lawyer jokes

What is the proper weight for a lawyer?About 3 pounds, .......not counting the urn!...

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Lawyer jokes

What kind of clothes do lawyers wear?Lawsuits....

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Whats the difference between a lawyer and an onion?You cry when you cut up an onion....

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Lawyer jokes

Whats the difference between a lawyer and atrampoline?You should take your workboots off beforeyou jump on a trampoline....

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Lawyer jokes

Where is the best place to hide a lawyer?In a brief case....

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Lawyer jokes

Why didnt Cupid shoot his arrow at the lawyers heart? Because even Cupid cant hit a target that small!...

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Lawyer jokes

Why dont lawyers enjoy playing golf?Because its too much like work, what with all of the lying involved....

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Lawyer jokes

Why dont lawyers play hide-and-seek?Nobody will look for them....

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Lawyer jokes

Why is it dangerous for a lawyer to walk onto a construction site when plumbers are working?Because they might connect t...

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Lawyer jokes

Why is it that if you give a child an encyclopedia, "lawyer" is always the third thing they look up?Because the first th...

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Lawyer jokes

Why is it that New Jersey got all the toxic waste dumps and California got all the lawyers?New Jersey had first choice....

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Lawyer jokes

Youre trapped in a room with a tiger, a rattlesnake and a lawyer. You have a gun with two bullets. What should you do?Yo...