Criminal Jokes Category:

All our jokes listing within the Criminal jokes category are listed below. Click on any of the items to view the full joke.

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Criminal jokes

"Dad," said Fred to his father, who was a bank robber. "I need $50 for the school trip tomorrow." "OK, son," said his da...

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Criminal jokes

"What makes you think the prisoner was drunk?" asked the judge. "Well, Your Honor," replied the arresting officer, "I sa...

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Criminal jokes

A boy is in a prison cell with no windows and no doors: there are no holes in the ceiling or trapdoors in the floor, yet...

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Criminal jokes

A computer geek goes to prison for fraud, they put him in a cell with a 300LB guy, Having heard what happens to geeks in...

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Criminal jokes

A mafiosos son sits at his desk writing a Christmas list to Jesus. He first writes, "Dear baby Jesus, I have been a good...

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Criminal jokes

A murderer, sitting in the electric chair, was about to be executed."Have you any last requests? asked the chaplain."Yes...

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Criminal jokes

A police officer was escorting a prisoner to jail when his hat blew off. "Shall I run and get it for you?" asked the pri...

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Criminal jokes

A prisoner at the Edmonton Max started training a large fly to do tricks.For years, for thousands of hours, he worked wi...

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Criminal jokes

A rapist, a gangster and a murderer are in the same car... Who is driving the car?A police officer!...

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Criminal jokes

A shoplifter was caught red-handed trying to steal a watch from an exclusive jewelry store. "Listen," said the shoplifte...

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Criminal jokes

A stupid bank robber rushed into a bank, pointed two fingers at the clerk and said, "This is a muck up!" "Dont you mean...

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Criminal jokes

A woman woke her husband in the middle of the night. "Theres a burglar downstairs eating the cake that I made this morni...

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Criminal jokes

An English prisoner of war was held by the Germans. The Englishman was shot all over the place, and okay until one day w...

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Criminal jokes

Bill: Where did you get that gold watch Joe?Joe: I won it in a race. Bill: How many people participated in it? Joe: Thre...

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Criminal jokes

Criminal: Why dont you hire these twins for the robbery, boss?Criminal Boss: Im afraid of a double-cross....

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Criminal jokes

Detective: Do you think I should put on the cuffs?Criminal: Why? You look good in short sleeves....

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Criminal jokes

Detective: How did you get into counterfeiting?Criminal: I answered an ad that said, "Make money at home."...

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Criminal jokes

Detective: Why did you dump those vegetables on my desk?Criminal: You said it was time to spill the beans....

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Criminal jokes

Did you hear about the burglar who fell in the cement mixer? Now hes a hardened criminal....

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Criminal jokes

Did you hear about the calendar thief?He got 12 months; they say his days are numbered!...

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Criminal jokes

Fred: We had a burglary last night, and they took everything except the soap and towels. Harry: The dirty crooks....

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Criminal jokes

How do bank robbers send messages?By flee mail!...

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Criminal jokes

I think I hear burglars, dear. Are you awake? No!...

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Criminal jokes

If you crossed a gangster and a garbage man, what would you have?Organised grime (crime)....

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Criminal jokes

It was Rockys first night in the penitentiary. All of the inmates were intheir cells and he was trying to become a bit m...

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Criminal jokes

Its a pity youve gone on hunger strike, said the convicts girlfriend on visiting day. Why ? Ive put a file in your cake....

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Criminal jokes

Judge: Tell me your occupation. Prisoner; Im a locksmith, Your Honour. Judge: Then what were you doing in a jewellery sh...

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Criminal jokes

Judge: Why did you steal that bird? Prisoner: For a lark, sir....

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Criminal jokes

Judge: You claim you robbed the grocery store because you were starving. So why didnt you take the food instead of the c...

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Criminal jokes

Knock KnockWhos there !Burglar !Burglar who ?Burglars dont knock !...